


Fight or Flight

by thelastwriter



Category: The Last Hours Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angry Kissing, Arguing, F/M, Mild Smut, Non-Explicit Sex, Unconfessed Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-18 04:01:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28986039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelastwriter/pseuds/thelastwriter
Summary: After the shocking meeting with Emmanuel Gast's ghost, Lucie is now safe in her room and has just been left alone with Matthew.READ NOTES!
Relationships: Matthew Fairchild/Lucie Herondale
Comments: 4
Kudos: 19





	Fight or Flight

**Author's Note:**

> Basically I reinvented the scene from the chapter "The End of It" from Chain of Gold, pp. 304, 305, 306. You will recognise some dialogues/descriptions which are taken from there, only I added more feelings and adapted them to my idea. Matthew's love is not really unrequited here as it is in the actual book. And let's be honest, the tension between those two in that chapter >>>>. I was talking to a friend of mine and we both agreed an angry kiss in that scene would have been super hot. This OS definitely got out of hand and went further than that, but yeah my friend wanted to read something like this and I felt like writing it, so it is what it is (also, we both desperately ship Fairondale, therefore we need any kind of content about them, and since it doesn't look like Cassie is going to make them canon, one must provide for oneself lmao). I feel a little embarassed because this is the first "smut" I'm posting here, but it isn't that explicit anyway so yeah. It starts with them being quite angry at each other but it gets more sentimental eventually. I think this is pretty much it. Hope you enjoy 😊

They were close, frighteningly close. And they were alone, facing each other on the settee in Lucie’s room. She was trying to ignore the annoying feeling of her sweaty hands as she argued with Matthew. His dark green eyes were staring at her as she nervously handled the steele and ran it over his wounded skin, drawing _iratzes_ with a fair degree of accuracy. Matthew’s warm hand was wrapped around Lucie’s smaller one, and his steady breathing tickled her face.

Concern was growing bigger and more urgent inside her by the minute. She had known Matthew since forever, they had grown up together, and even though she would often force herself to think of him as a brother, moments like that one made her realise how far from it he actually was. She didn't remember when she had started looking at him in a different way– interestingly, her mind could clearly recollect all the happy memories from their childhood, but couldn't do the same with the most recent ones.

Lucie wondered what had brought Matthew to start drinking so much and getting wasted more and more often. It had been a while since she had seen him completely sober. He no longer was the same happy, carefree Matthew who would challenge her to soup ladle duels, only to end up surrendering most of the times, and who used to always save a dance for her every time their families would throw a party. The light that she had always seen in his eyes had completely faded away, and he didn’t seem to be able to find it again.

«Others, like my brother and my parents, do not see what they do not want to see. But I see, and I am worried» Lucie said.

«Worried about me? I’m flattered» he answered. Anger was building up inside her. She knew that something was up, something dark and dangerous which he had been keeping from her. The fact that he wouldn’t tell her made her feel like he didn’t trust her anymore, and that made her chest hurt. She felt like she had failed at being his friend– like she had failed at being even _more_ than just his friend. She felt like she had lost her special place in his heart– a place that, perhaps, she had taken too much for granted through the years.

«I am worried that you will get my brother killed.» She didn’t mean to say that. She regretted saying it the minute the words left her mouth. Matthew looked petrified, and a grimace of pain appeared on his lips, as if she had just stabbed him right in the heart.

It was too late to take that back. «You are his _parabatai_ » Lucie said, her voice shaking slightly. «He trusts you– to be his back in battle, to be his shield and sword, and if you are not yourself–»

Matthew stood up, eyes dark and sorrowful at the same time. «If it were anyone else but you, Lucie, saying these things to me–»

«Then what?» Lucie also rose to her feet. She barely reached Matthew’s shoulder, but she glared at him anyway. A series of mixed emotions took over, overwhelming her. Her heart was racing.

Matthew didn’t divert his furious glance from her. «What would you do?» Lucie insisted. Matthew didn’t say a word. Instead, he frowned and walked towards the door, but as soon as he got to the doorway he stopped, hesitatingly. He turned around to look at her again. She was visibly shocked and confused. He hesitated once more. Eventually, he slammed the door vehemently and walked his way back to Lucie. Her light-blue eyes scanned him carefully, fearful of his next reaction.

Almost involuntarily, Lucie began to back away, until her shoulders touched the cold, hard wall of her room. Matthew moved forward until he was dangerously close to her. She remained silent as he stared at her– he was looking for answers in her gaze.

A blink of the eye.

With a swift movement he put an arm around her hips and brought his other hand behind her head. His lips crushed against hers with desperation. Lucie let out a gasp of surprise, but then closed her eyes and pressed herself harder against the wall, grasping his shirt to pull him closer and running her fingers aggressively through his hair, almost pulling it in the heat of the moment, still driven by the anger growling inside her.

Matthew’s lips tasted like brandy. They were sweet and they were devouring hers with hunger. The room around them was now filled with the sound of heavy breathing and faint whispers. Matthew’s hand left Lucie’s cheek and moved lower, below her thigh, lifting it up and tying it around his waist.

Lucie’s skirts lifted slightly, uncovering her bare legs. Matthew brought his other hand on her back as he traced the outline of her lips with his tongue and then slipped lower to kiss her neck, causing her to shiver and whimper. To her surprise, she realised she wanted _more_. As if he'd read her mind, his fingers now lingered on the buttons of Lucie’s dress. With a swift move, he almost tore them away and the dress slipped slightly, uncovering her décolleté. She pulled away to look at him in the eyes– then she shrugged and left the dress fall completely on the floor, revealing her corset and undergarments. Matthew swallowed hard and gave her a mesmerized look as she took his jacket off and threw it on the floor along with her clothes.

Her eyes were still burning with fury, but now something else had come along with it. Matthew had stopped to look at her, as if he was trying to figure out what that was. Lucie moved forward and began kissing him again. She was all but delicate, but Matthew didn’t seem to mind at all. Her moves caused him to stagger– the last drops of alcohol in his system still made it difficult for him to control his movements. Lucie led him to the other side of the room, where her bed was.

Matthew kept kissing her hungrily, letting her guide him. When they reached the edge of the bed, he fell backwards, with his back pressed into the mattress, and Lucie found herself straddling him. She leaned down and kissed him again, her fingers entwined with his. Then her hands moved to Matthew’s shirt– she undid the buttons and removed it hastily, revealing his sculpted chest, all scattered with white scars and black runes. They looked like a weird constellation: Lucie thought they were beautiful. Everything about Matthew was beautiful. She kissed him there, and the way she moved her hips made Matthew moan weakly. His hands cupped her cheeks, locking eyes with her again. The light around them was becoming dimmer, as the night came down outside the windows and London was getting ready to go to sleep.

«Luce» Matthew mumbled, gently stroking her hair. «We should stop now.»

Lucie looked at him. The anger inside her thinned out, giving way to pure, burning passion. «Perhaps we should» she answered, never breaking eye contact. Then she took his hands and guided them behind her back, placing them over her corset strings. The look on her face was totally serious as her eyes, along with that small gesture, gave him the consent he was implicitly asking for.

Lucie thought about Eugenia. She had heard the rumours about her ruined reputation. She also thought about what her own dangerous behaviour could mean for her and for her family, already unfairly tainted by her mother’s demon blood. She pictured the astonishment on her brother’s face, were he to find out about it, after she had insisted multiple times that her feelings were of a different nature from Matthew’s. All that was pure contradiction, it was irrational and utterly reckless– she hadn’t even thought of ever being capable of pushing herself that far. Not like that, at least. She had read about this kind of situations in a couple of books– she knew what was going to happen next. She should have stopped before she could regret her actions. Then why were her feelings so far from any kind of hesitation or guilt?

She was afraid, of course, just like most women were before taking that big step in their lives. But this fear became almost insignificant when Matthew’s fingers tightened around the corset strings and began untying them with promptness and skill. That gesture and his enraptured glance made her shiver. She understood that what was keeping her from backing off was the sight of Matthew himself, lying down under her. Matthew, who, despite all the tension that had built up in the room earlier, was now touching her like he was afraid of hurting her and was looking at her as if she were the most desirable thing he had ever laid his eyes on. It was the consideration and the admiration in his eyes that made her feel completely safe.

When the corset came off as well, her white petticoat left little room to the imagination. Matthew grabbed her by the hips, lifting himself up and shifting on top of her. Lucie could feel his blond curls tickling her forehead. Being that close to him was suddenly making her feel all funny in her lower stomach. It was a new kind of feeling, but she found it quite pleasant. She took his hand, cheeks flushed red, and shyly placed it on her still covered breasts.

Matthew inhaled and exhaled deeply. «Lucie...» he groaned. He lingered on that spot for a few seconds, then moved his hand to her thigh, and she shivered at the feeling of the cold rings against her hot skin. With a feather-like touch, his ringed fingers moved slowly, then grabbed her petticoat and lifted it up, sliding carefully between her legs.

Lucie gasped and blushed harder. He kissed her forehead, her cheeks, her nose and her mouth again, more gently this time. He moved his hand on her for a bit, drifting away only to undress her completely. Instinctively, he brought his lips on her breasts and began to leave a trail of kisses there. Lucie's heart was about to blow-up in her chest, which was moving up and down at an irregular pace.

Lucie brought her hands on the hem of Matthew's trousers and he helped her taking them off him. The temperatures were not particularly high or low that time of the year, yet they were feeling like it was the hottest day of summer, and quivering like in the middle of winter at the same time.

Lucie found herself exposed and tangled to Matthew’s naked body. He looked at her again, his gaze both questioning and worried, but also full of lust. She put her arms around his wide shoulders and nodded weakly. Matthew looked at her tenderly as he finally pushed himself inside her. Lucie closed her eyes, and he began to kiss her lips again as he thrusted slowly into her. When he heard Lucie moan, he stopped. «Am I hurting you? I can stop– you tell me, Luce.» He was shaking.

Lucie opened her eyes again and smiled at him. «You’ve already stopped, you fool.»

Matthew chuckled. «You’re right.»

«Don’t stop again.»

Lucie pulled him closer and kissed him, and he started moving again, breathing heavily. Matthew laced their fingers together. They were both holding back their sighs and words to prevent them from reaching to unwanted listeners. Lucie had never believed she could feel that way, it was all so new and astounding to her. Jessamine had once told her that, when the time would come, she would just have had to let the man take the lead and the rest would have figured itself out... yet now she felt as much in control as Matthew was. She felt completely responsible for the deep sounds that were escaping Matthew’s mouth, his flushed cheeks and the sweat on his forehead. She felt him tremble at her touch just like she did at his– which was equally intense, although undoubtedly more experienced. Eventually Matthew collapsed onto her, panting and whispering her name multiple times, and Lucie held him tight as she abandoned herself to a pleasure she would have later described in her notebook as “just as great as unexpected” (in code words, of course). Her brown curls were escaping from her ribbons and were sticking to her face, shiny with sweat– Matthew moved some of them away from her eyes, then he kissed her gently and slightly bit her lower lip, receiving a surprised giggle in turn.

They kept holding onto each other after sliding under the warm covers, and soon tiredness and sleepiness got the better of them.

~~~

Matthew woke up in the middle of the night, while Lucie was sleeping peacefully beside him. He looked at her, so calm and insanely beautiful, her naked body wrapped into the messy sheets. He wondered if she was dreaming. His heart skipped a beat as he recollected what had happened a few hours earlier– when he had first got there, he definitely wasn’t expecting things to turn out the way they had. He had always known that Lucie didn’t reciprocate his feelings– that was why he had been so astonished that she hadn’t pushed him away when he had yielded to the urge to kiss her. And what had happened next was just... _incredible_ , nearly absurd. For a moment there he thought that he had imagined it all, he feared that it had just been another side effect of the alcohol. But he hadn’t had much enough to cloud his judgement last night, and the girl sleeping beside him was indeed very real. When he looked at her again Matthew’s stomach twisted into knots. What if she regretted it all the next day? He dreaded the idea of having ruined her and that she would hate him forever because of that. The guilt, a feeling which had been living inside him for years now, devouring him slowly, grew bigger. And yet, besides that fear, another feeling, much stronger, warmed up his soul and rode out the storm. He leaned down to kiss her forehead. He caught the glimpse of a smile on her lips.

Quietly, careful not to wake her, Matthew slipped out of the bed, shivering at the sudden change of temperature. For a moment there he was tempted to go back to her and hold her in his arms until morning, but he couldn’t risk being caught there. He retrieved his clothes and put them back on quickly, then he left the room, looked around to be sure no one could see him, and sneaked out the Institute. He looked up to Lucie’s room one last time, smiling. He turned around and walked away, disappearing into the shadows of London by night, with the promise to come back to her right away the next day. He wouldn't think about leaving her alone, ever again.

With only a quarter moon and a few brighter stars to enlighten his path, Matthew walked his way back home briskly. Once he got inside, he took off his shoes and locked the door. He went up to his room, undressed himself lazily and, yawning, he slipped into his bed. He thought of drinking from the flask which rested on his nightstand, like he used to do very often recently– this time instead, he looked at it and turned it in his hands for a bunch of seconds, then he put it back where he had found it. He lied down face-up, staring at the dark ceiling and thinking of Lucie, of her body wrapped tightly around his. He could still smell her scent on his skin and feel her hands touching him and filling him with life.

He didn’t think about tomorrow, about what the sunlight would bring. He didn’t think back to the dark shadow that was hanging over him and didn’t seem to be going anywhere. Now, his mind was all full of Lucie, Lucie, Lucie. Lulled by that thought, he fell back sound asleep. 


End file.
